The Clock Stops Here...

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Penis Envy

Just for once, I wish I was a man. A carefree, ego less, being, with very few wardrobe concerns and even less hair worries, none of which are influenced by barometer or mercury. At the moment, I am seething with (penis) envy...There. I said it.

We have a wonderful party to attend tonight. After the death of the market in October, there has been a dearth of parties, even in Greenwich, which is notoriously social. Our hosts, are relaxed and fun loving and clearly enjoy entertaining. Invitations are coveted and no one declines. Even if your kid was having an appendectomy, you would be taking shifts with your spouse, "just to go and say hello". Alright... I would.

If you accept an invitation, I think you have certain obligations to your host; to show up and leave at an appropriate time, to be gracious and if there is a dress code, to follow it to the letter. Being a guest is a privilege and to do less, is in my opinion, is disrespectful. (Thank you Miss Manner's).

This is long winded way of getting to my beauty dilemma, shared by all the women who will be attending, and never once, entering the cerebellum, of the men, not even for a nano second. What to you do, about your hair, makeup, clothes and shoes, when you will be dancing under a tent, the temperature is cool, the humidity is high and tornado's continue to loom?

First, there is hair. 3 options: tie it back, beat it into submission, let it go.. Second, the makeup. Primers and waterproof everything or bare face and let it go. Lastly, attire. That adorable dress you bought in February, to wear to a, "great summer party"? Put it back your cedar closet, at least, for a few more weeks. Those gorgeous sandals you splurged on, because you were "only going to buy accessories" and they would "go with everything"? Keep 'em stuffed and cosseted in their little cloth cocoon, back in that cedar closet. If you wear long sleeves, it will eventually be hot and disrobing is not an option. If you wear no sleeves, it will be undoubtedly chilly until the food and drinks kick in.

I have a towel on my head and a few hours to figure it out. Tomorrow, I will let you know my battle plan and how it all fared. When it's all said it done, none of it will be worth worrying about, because it will be a sensational party and all of this worrying, will have been for nought--- I will be carefree, ego less and just one of the boys...


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