The Globes

OMG I don't know where to begin my dissection of the Golden Globes Fashion feast.

Let's start with the trends: Strapless (ad nauseum), One shoulder (ad nauseum), black (zzzzzzz), nude, important earrings, bare necks, jeweled and embellished gowns, short.

Let's continue with the sluts: Mariah Carey, Anna Pacquin, Olivia Wilde, and Jennifer Aniston flashing her pubic bone, (was that really necessary??? Brangelina were not even in attendance).

Kudos to the A-List-: Including Julianna Margulies (though I think she was having a Botox malfunction with her right eye), Jennifer Garner (though I think she was having Restylane malfunction with her upper lip), Kate Winslet, Reese Witherspoon (who is always pitch perfect, though I still cannot find out whose dress she was wearing despite exhaustive research), Ginnifer Goodwin in a short violet Vionnet, (which she rocked) with the sweetest short pixie hair cut, Toni Collette who looked beautiful, (for Toni Collette).

The J Team: As in Jane and Judy Jetson-Kate Hudson, January Jones, Chistina Aguilera, Anna Kendrick, Drew Barrymore (from the hip down). Out of this world...literally.

Curtain Calls- Shower and stage (caution: no smoking-- highly flammable materials) Julianne Moore, Rita Wilson, Elizabeth Moss, Heidi Klum, Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Fergie, Monique, Jennifer Goodman, Christina Hendricks (though her bosoms, hair and makeup were insanely beautiful), Amy Poehler and Calista Flockhart.

Girls, for the future: Miss Scarlet was the only one whoever made the curtain thing work.

The F List: As in what the "F" were you thinking??? Tina Fey and Jessica Lange (both in the usually impeccable Zac Posen),Patricia Arquette, Cher, Diane Kruger, Marion Cotillard and Jane Adams. Pearls of Wisdom: Hire a stylist. If they are currently in your employ, fire the stylist.

One last bone to pick... I think she is an outstandingly talented actress, but, I will never understand Chloe Sevigny's long held fashion icon status. If any one out there thinks that greige Valentino was a knock out, 'splain it to me, won't you???

xox,
DD